Author: David

Kid Rock was arrested last night for getting in a fight at a Waffle House just down the street from me. I live in a pretty gay part of Atlanta, so that must mean that Kid Rock is gay. But that’s his choice :0)

In other Atlanta news, I enjoy buying clothes for girls. But, being a single man, I often find myself purchasing clothes for my friends’ wives and/or girlfriends.

For example, Leslie wanted “nice, going-out” clothes for her recent birthday. So I spent a few afternoon hours at the mall and picked out what I think Leslie would like, but not necessarily items similar to what she already wears. I would consider Leslie’s style elegant-conservative.

I went with a silky, sleeveless, chartreuse blouse that has a sequined strap across the front. The color is more yellow that green and according to the hipster Express girl is the hot color of the season. It’s probably a little more daring and trendy than Leslie normally wears, but, again, I was trying to get her something just barely different than she already has. I also picked her up silky, black, sleeveless top with black flowers at the very top. I thought it was classy and could be worn to cocktail party, coupled with a skirt and sweater.

It did, however, look a lot more like lingerie when I gave it to her in front of a bunch of people than it did in the store. So I was a little uncomfortable.

My questions are:
A) Is it appropriate for me to buying clothes for my friends’ wives/girlfriends?
B) Why do you think I like shopping for girls clothes so much?
C) How many of you, boys or girls, would trust me to buy an outfit that you had to wear to a big occasion?

Thank you for your time.

P.S. Kent … If you feel like posting pictures of the items I gave Leslie maybe that would help people with their answers.

A high school student in Atlanta recently wrote a column in the school newspaper, criticizing homosexuals and even going to the extent of calling them “reproductive errors.”

For the record, I believe homosexuality is a choice; otherwise, I believe science would have discovered a common trait among gay people by now.

I understand that my belief is offensive to homosexuals. I’m not really sure why. Paul tried to explain it to me one time, but I don’t think I ever really grasped the concept.
He also tried to answer my other big question about homosexuals: If gay men like men, why do some often dress like women and act feminine? But, again, I’m not really sure of his answer.

(Disclaimer: I apologize beforehand if I’m offending anyone. It is not my attention.)

The student, Thomas Benjamin, wrote: “I realize biology commits many reproductive errors. Homosexuality can be one of them.”

Do you think homosexuality is a choice or a biological error or neither? Do you have a problem with the school paper publishing the article? Do you have a problem with me?

Don’t let anyone ever tell you that you have to be smart to play professional football.
First off, there’s Joe Theisman, who famously once said, “Jim Haslet should be the coach of the year.” (Funny, I don’t remember Jimmy actually ever coaching. There was no one better at standing on the sidelines trying to act disappointed, though.)
But, if you need further proof of what kind of mental fortitude it takes to make in the NFL, take this test. It’s a sample of the Wonderlic test given to players entering the NFL Draft. It’s also used by large companies to assess an applicant’s metal abilities.
http://www.angelfire.com/fl3/existence/wonderlic.html
Former Ravens linebacker Roderick Green’s score of 3 is reportedly the lowest score ever. Auburn cornerback David Irons and Weber State safety Bo Smith recorded 4’s this year.
I’m way smarter than all three of those guys and even smarter than Dan Marino. Take the test and see if you’re smarter than them, too.
(It should be mentioned that David Irons, in his defense, has been diagnosed with a learning disability.)