Author: mrunstoppable

Kosterpeldings Lose a Friend

Louise

Last night, I went downstairs to feed the birds, and found that Louise had somehow died.

Louise was a good bird. She never quite had the spunk of Harry, but she was steadying force in our bird cage. She was a good bird. She didn’t want to die, and we didn’t want her to go.

Truth be told, Chelsey and I grew to really hate those birds. They were loud and messy, and loud some more. But now that we have lost one of them, I feel horrible. I feel horrible because something I was supposed to take care of has died. And I feel horrible because I know how lonely Harry is going to be now.

If love means never having to say you are sorry, then pet ownership should mean never having to bury your bird in the middle of the night behind your garage.

How To Live (Cont)

Lesson 3: How To Watch Hurricane Coverage

First you put it on the weather channel. But the weather channel is really boring and they keep talking about your local weather, so the next step is to CNN. CNN is not boring at all, because eveyone on the network is really excited about everything that is going on. They over-react to everything. I believe they reported about 4 breaches through he course of the morning. Then you get freaked out. So you go upstairs and start watching WWL on the internet. They make you feel much better about things, but there is no couch in the office, so you go back down again. Repeat for 4 hours. Then go swimming because it’s Labor Day, and this is your last chance. Then come back, and do it all over again.

How To Live (Cont.)

Lesson 2: Get a Dry Erase Board

Dry erase boards are the greatest. They are very good for making to-do lists, remembering dates, playing hangman, and counting down. They are also good for brain storming sessions, and last minute reminders. I have two and I use them all the time.

I would reccommend staying away from the Foray brand however. Bad news. Lousy Markers.

Here is a quick list of DEB list uses:

1) Groceries
2) Concert Dates
3) Packing Lists
4) Threats
5) Bills
6) Sex
7) Birthday Gifts
8) Cd’s you want
9) People you hate
10) Things your cat will eat

How To Live

I have decided to start publishing a how-to manual on life, based on the lessons I have learned.

Lesson 1: Keeping Cold Water Handy

It’s advisable to have two water pitchers in the fridge at all times. That way you have a better chance of not running out of cold water. If you plan it right, you should be able to run out of the first one, then refill it. Then you start using the second pitcher. By the time the second one is empty, the first one will be cold again. Enjoy!

Also, it is always best to refill both pitchers before you go to bed, just in case. BUT, it is important that you make sure you fill up a nice big glass of cold water (and one for your significant other, if applicable) before doing so. Otherwise you end up getting a half-cold glass of water.

Brent’s List of Football

Here are my fearless predictions for 2008-2009

AFC EAST – NEW ENGLAND – STILL GOOD, BUT LESS PHYSICAL OVERALL.

AFC NORTH – PITTSBURGH – I HATE PITTSBURGH.

AFC SOUTH – JACKSONVILLE – VERY PHYSICAL, INDY STARTS THEIR DESCENT.

AFC WEST – SAN DIEGO – LITTLE KNOWN FACT ABOUT THE CHARGERS: THEY HAVE NO SOUL.

AFC WILDCARD – INDY – MANNING HAS HIS WORST YEAR SINCE 2001

AFC WILDCARD – TENNESSEE – THE AFC SOUTH IS GOING TO BE AWESOME THIS YEAR.

NFC EAST – PHILADELPHIA EAGLES – DONOVAN AND ANDY PUT IT TOGETHER FOR ONE LAST YEAR OF BEING RELEVANT. THEN DONOVAN BREAKS DOWN IN WEEK 14.

NFC NORTH – DETROIT LIONS – IT HAS TO HAPPEN SOONER OR LATER.

NFC SOUTH – CAROLINA PANTHERS – HOW CAN I LOVE JOHN FOX SO MUCH WHEN HE COACHES FOR A DIVISION RIVAL. I ALSO LIKE THE WAY STEVE SMITH IS PUNCHING PEOPLE.

NFC WEST – ARIZONA – SEATTLE IS HELD TOGETHER BY SAP AND GUM. ARIZONA IS YOUNG AND SEXY. I GO WITH YOUNG AND SEXY OVER SAP AND GLUE. I JUST DO.

NFC WILDCARD – WASHINGTON REDSKINS – ONE OF THE MANY TEAMS THAT WILL BEAT UP ON DALLAS THIS YEAR

NFC WILDCARD – TAMPA BAY BUCCANEERS – WITH BRETT FAVRE AT THE HELM!

SUPERBOWL: I DON’T LIKE ANY OF THE NFC TEAMS, SO I WILL JUST PICK JACKSONVILLE TO WIN UNOPPOSED.